Quietly Neurodivergent

Honest, practical support for autistic, ADHD and otherwise neurodivergent people in study, work and daily life. Wondering where to start? Find out about Quiet Neurodivergence and what could mean for you.

Supporting a Quietly Neurodivergent Child Without Pushing Them Past Breaking Point

Posted on 21 January 202620 January 2026 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Some children look like “no problem” at school and then fall apart at home. If your child seems to cope all day and then crashes in the evening, you may not be doing anything wrong at all. This article looks at quietly neurodivergent children who mask through the school day, then melt down or shut down where it finally feels safe. It offers gentle ideas for decompression time, homework, clubs and talking to school, and explains why “rudeness” is often overload, not bad character.

Being a Good Colleague to Someone Who’s Quietly Neurodivergent

Posted on 17 January 202614 January 2026 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

You might have a colleague who is bright and reliable but often quiet, hard to read or exhausted after busy days. Maybe they’ve told you they are autistic or ADHD, or maybe you just have a sense that the world takes more effort for them. This guide offers practical, plain-English ways to be a good colleague: clearer emails, reasonable notice, respecting headphone time, avoiding minimising jokes and gossip, and remembering you don’t have to fix them to make work a little kinder.

Applying for Jobs When You’re Quietly Neurodivergent: Disclosing, Not Disclosing, and Finding What Fits

Posted on 16 January 202615 January 2026 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Job applications are hard work for most people. When you’re quietly neurodivergent, they can feel like an extra unpaid job. You’re writing forms and preparing for interviews while also deciding whether to mention autism, ADHD or related differences at all. This guide explores the real fear of being filtered out or treated as a box-ticking exercise, and offers gentle, practical ideas on when to disclose, when not to, and how to ask for adjustments in plain English.

Small Fidgets and Comfort Objects for Neurodivergent Brains in Meetings

Posted on 10 January 20263 January 2026 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

If you fidget constantly in meetings and worry it looks unprofessional, you’re not alone. For many autistic and ADHD people, small, quiet fidgets and discreet earplugs are genuine focus tools, not bad habits. This article looks at why they help, how to choose subtle options that work in your environment, and what to say if someone asks, “Are you paying attention?”

Living With Someone Who Comes Home Exhausted From Masking: A Guide for Partners

Posted on 3 January 20262 January 2026 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

If your partner comes home from work exhausted, quiet or shut down while everyone else sees them “coping fine”, it can really hurt. This guide explains what masking is, why home becomes the crash site, and how you can support them with decompression time, low-pressure evenings and kinder language – without ignoring your own needs.

Neurodiversity Practical Guide for Managers

How to Support a Quietly Neurodivergent Employee: A Practical Guide for Managers

Posted on 22 December 202520 December 2025 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Many managers want to support neurodivergent staff but quietly worry about getting it wrong. This article explains what “quietly neurodivergent” can look like at work, why masking and exhaustion are so common, and how clear expectations, written follow-up and small adjustments can make a big difference. It’s written in plain English so a neurodivergent person can share it with their line manager and say, “This is quite close to my experience.”

Phones, Video Calls and Real-Time Panic: A Neurodivergent Guide

Posted on 20 December 202520 December 2025 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Many autistic and ADHD people don’t just “dislike” phone and video calls – they find them genuinely exhausting. Real-time processing, unspoken social cues and the pressure to respond quickly can leave you anxious before the call and wiped out afterwards. This article explores why calls are so hard, why preferring text, IM or email is a valid access need, and offers gentle scripts and small strategies for coping when calls are unavoidable and for asking for alternatives when that’s possible.

Thinking About an Autism or ADHD Assessment When the World Is Shouting About “Overdiagnosis”

Posted on 18 December 202518 December 2025 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Headlines about “overdiagnosis” and people gaming the system can make it harder to take your own struggles seriously. This article offers a quiet counterpoint: why many of us seek autism or ADHD assessment for clarity, self-understanding and fair support rather than money, how minimising phrases like “we’re all on the spectrum somewhere” miss the point, and why you’re allowed to ask questions about your own brain even in a hostile political climate.

Social Invitations, Guilt and Saying No Without Burning Bridges

Posted on 17 December 202517 December 2025 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

Around Christmas, New Year and other busy seasons, social invitations can pile up fast. For many autistic and ADHD people, every event carries hidden costs in energy, masking and recovery time. This article explores why invitations can feel so heavy, how to get honest about your social capacity, and offers gentle scripts for saying no – or “yes, but differently” – without burning your relationships or yourself out.

Vague Instructions Are an Access Issue

Posted on 17 December 202517 December 2025 by Andrew at Quietly Neurodivergent

“Can you just pull something together?” can feel like a small request, but for many autistic and ADHD people it creates a huge amount of hidden work. This article looks at why vague instructions are an access issue, how our brains juggle multiple interpretations at once, and offers simple, kind scripts and questions to get clearer outcomes, deadlines and formats without feeling difficult.

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